Tag Archives: motherhood

January 10, 2008 · 6:23 am

Baby’s mistakes are really the mommie’s..or so people believe

You see a badly behaved child and you blame the parents – mostly the mom if she’s the one staying at home with the child. And though you may have a point there, it’s not really always the case.

It could be that the child’s just be having a bad day, he or she may not always behave that way. But no one looks at it like that, people usually go away with an “impression” and you’d hear things like “I saw her baby and God, she’s badly brought up, she was throwing a tantrum in the middle of the supermarket..blah blah..” The mommy, for all her hard work, unfortunately, is judged by one incident and the rest is forgotten. That’s the sad truth.

I could be spending hundreds of hours with my child, telling her all about good manners but the one day we go out and bump into someone we know, would be the one day my daughter decides to be defiant – she’s going through the “no” phase most two-year olds seem to love.

You can read all the books and sites you want about dealing with defiance, but they are of little use when you have a bawling two-year old stubbornly refusing “other pleasing alternatives”. You just have to ride it out and hope you don’t meet any more people you know.

Mommyhood is a tough job, it’s something like being an investment banker..you can make all the right decisions but you’ll be remembered by the wrong one you make.

2 Comments

Filed under mommyrage

Tagged as , , , ,

January 4, 2008 · 5:45 am

Mommies need breaks but no one realizes that..

It’s a 24-7 job and it’s been said a million times before, but it’s one of those things that people say and get past..”oh, it’s a full time job..blah blah..” but no one actually cares about the mommy, no one makes the effort to make it easy for the mommy, no one, least of all the husband!

In cases where the mommy is working, it’s actually easier, because then bringing up the baby is automatically divided, but in cases like mine, where I have made the choice (and not always am i happy about that, but that’s for another day) to be at home, there becomes a “this is your job” syndrome..and I hate it. I may not go to work but I need my break. Also, everything automatically becomes the mother’s fault..”she’s screaming because you didn’t control her in time”..right, that’s nice to hear. It makes a feel a whole lot better about giving up my work and being with the baby. Thanks a lot.

1 Comment

Filed under mommyrage

Tagged as , , ,

December 17, 2007 · 5:38 am

My head aches..

The thing with motherhood is that you need to be positive all the time. Your toddler will not understand your moods or even something as simple as a headache. I told my daughter the other day that I was not feeling so great, and she got scared..her mother, in her eyes, is immune to everything, so it’s not something she wants to hear. So when I feel low, I can’t show it to my daughter, or to anyone. I’ll just wait for her to grow up..maybe then she’ll understand.

Leave a comment

Filed under mommyrage

Tagged as

December 14, 2007 · 1:29 pm

I must be crazy..

Let me say this first, that this will sound a little insane, given all the venting I’ve been doing about mommy rage and the rest of it (but I’ll defend that later). That said, let me say it: – I am considering a second baby. Yup, that’s right. I want another one, not so much for myself, but for my daughter.

But wait, I am not totally crazy – may be a little – but not all gone yet. The thing is that I believe, and I could be waaay wrong, that having a second one is going to actually make it better, if I can do the whole nappy-change-sleep-deprived-will-lose-it thing again. It’ll be tough for two years and given that at the end of those two years I am still not in an asylum, I think, seriously, that it’ll be good.

My two year old will, say I have one nine months from now, be about five when the younger one will be two, so from then on, they’ll be company for each other.

I’ve actually studied this, not to mention been told this like a zillion times by my mother, that mothers with two kids find that they demand much less of their time that those with one, who needs to be entertained constantly. Of course there are days when all you do is sort out their little fights..but all in all, it’s better to have two.

That’s the theory and I am not sure if it’ll translate into anything, but if it does, I am hoping that I am thinking it right. If not, I’ll be blogging from an asylum in about two years. Yup, I think I’ll still blog.

For now, it’s back to potty training. Sigh.

2 Comments

Filed under mommyrage

Tagged as , , , ,

December 6, 2007 · 1:19 pm

Your quandary is yours and yours alone, no one else cares..

Winter is tough at the best of times, so with lack of sleep and wailing babies, it seems close to intolerable..but wait I am a mother, how can I lose patience?? I hear that kind of asinine talk all the time. In my mommyrage mood, this is enough to make me lash out hard.

Why is the world not more understanding of mommies and their issues? (no pun intended!) Be it the workplace or at home, a woman is pretty much on her own to figure it all out. If you have a good boss you’ll get some understanding but expect no more, come on we all have kids and they get brought up somehow so stop whining if you are at work – that’s the general attitude. No surprise then that most super-successful women are either single or have children who hardly know them.

You can’t do both, if you want to do both things well..no matter what anyone says..not possible. Ya lots of women work and bring up kids but the question is – how much do they miss out at work because they are not willing to put in that extra time? A lot. And if you take the hot-career path, then the kids will not get the kind of attention they need. No two ways about it.

It’s not fair. My situation does not allow me to leave my daughter at home, yet when I told my boss, who was perfectly happy with my work, that I wanted to work from home, he told me I’d be setting a bad precedent! HR (go on, fire that distasteful gun) would not be happy, and one would rather displease God than HR!

So here I am, (mommy)blogging to keep my sanity, and wondering if I am good for anything else.

1 Comment

Filed under mommyrage

Tagged as , , ,