Tag Archives: parenting

I agree that my blog name does little for my case of wanting another child, but, if we forget that for a moment, then I am wondering if I am crazy to want another one?

I’ve talked about this before, and as time passes I feel it more and more, but a second child, I feel, will ease things for me in the longer run. I look at my sister, who has only one child, and she is all the time clinging to her and sulking and the rest of it. She now even asks my sister why she has no siblings and wants to know why she’ll never have any.

I don’t want to be in that situation. My gynecologist said it quite well when I had my daughter – she said: “you have the first one for yourself and the second one for the first one”. And it’s true.

But, I am scared. What if I can’t handle it? ( I mean look at all the mommyrage stuff!). My mother seems to think it’ll make it better and I am divided. But, I can’t sit on it for too long, am not getting younger, so it’s something that’s either going to happen now, or never. Even from a work perspective, it’s better I get it over with now, than get back to work and again…aahh..sounds exhausting already!

I wish you could take turns with men, they have one and you have one. Except can you imagine a man in labor? A cut finger is just about what they can handle. No, I think they won’t survive that. There’s a reason God made women bear the children.

Parenting, no let me correct this, mommying is no cake walk. Really. It’s lovely to be a mom, let me slip that in first before I vent (yes, it makes me feel less guilty). But, it’s trying too and it’s funny how mothers don’t want to admit that. I know so many women who feel this way but they would rather sweep things under the carpet than admit it. Not that I am asking them to tell the world, but they’d rather be in denial even for themselves. I guess it makes them feel better..to each his own. I vent it here and it makes me feel better!

Actually, mommyrage is not about the child, it’s about the situation the mother finds herself in, the challenges she faces (esp the first time) and the little support she gets. The mother, at the end of the day, takes the brunt of it, my mother did and I do too. It’s just the way it is and it’s not changing anytime soon. Ok, here I must admit that my situation is a whole lot better than my mother’s was, but the crux of it is the same.

So, like I said in my last post that I was under the weather and needed some down time – so I guess this is all coming from there..I know it’s only the flu, but right now I need my mommy, and my daughter needs hers.

Cough. Cough. Sneeze. Sneeze.

My daughter will be two next month and I am trying (trying is all mommies can do) to instill some good qualities in her, you know, getting her to say please and thank you and all the rest of it.

At first it was tough , because being a typical toddler, or so I liked to believe, she would say no to just about everything, no matter what I tried. So, I decided to let her be, which is exactly when she started saying the magic words!

Aha, I thought, had I just cracked it? Was it really that simple?I wondered why it hadn’t occurred to me earlier. I wanted to tell all toddler mommies in the world about my eureka moment, to share my wisdom and relieve suffering moms.

Except, of course, it didn’t even last till I reached out for my computer. My obvious elation was enough to set her back!

But, it was a start, and from then on she realized that please was the one word that had the best chance at getting her a pat on the back and anything she took fancy to.  Needless to say, I didn’t quite look at it that way. I mean I was ok with the positive-reinforcement thing but using that to her advantage? Hmm..

Anyhow, I let it pass, not wanting to rock the boat. Till, one day, she started slapping at being refused anything – be it sticking her finger into sockets or putting everything into her mouth. That’s when I reminded her about saying please.

Now, she simply says please if she wants something, but the trouble is, that if she is denied it, she keeps saying please. In her mind please is the password that will get her what she wants and if she does not get it, she sees little point in using the word! But mama you said, say please, now gimme!

Sigh.