I wish I had the guts to swim against the current..

In the good old days, children went to school at, what? say 4 or 5? maybe a tad earlier. But not at 2, that’s for sure. So when I told my father that I was putting my two year old into play school (she’ll be almost 2.5 when she goes) he thought I’d lost it, which it does not take much for him to think, he’s old school and I am, well, mostly, not.

He’s nuts about my daughter so he was upset. And I’ve been sitting on the fence about it anyway, so I kept (read keep) swinging between whether to send her or not. Looking around me didn’t help, since everyone sends their kids at some bizarre age or the other. And that’s not what I want to do anyway, to send her just because the whole world is doing it. But, I have enrolled her for July for the Toddler session, she goes everyday for three hours.

First, I was so worried about her whole interaction that I was ignoring, rather stifling, this little voice in my head that kept asking me if that’s what I really wanted. She has to go to school for a long time to come, did I really want to start it now? Did I not want her to be at home with me, playing the morning games we do, watering the lawn, playing with water, reading, and all the rest of it. Did I want to force her into a routine just because it was the right thing to do? She’s two for Christ’s sake.

But, till her interaction was over I managed to silence that voice. But now it’s back and I want to face these questions.

I know the answers and it makes me sad. The truth is that, if I was ensured admission into a decent (and that’s a whole different story, but for another day) school, I’d probably not send her now. I do think she’s too young and needs me more that she needs a routine. But, I don’t have the balls. I know that by the time she is three and over, I’ll have driven myself insane thinking about her admissions. At least this way I know that she will continue in this school, which, hopefully, will be right for her.

Its going to be five days a week, and this is the other thing that bothers me. Why make a toddler go five days? Three seems right to me. That way, they’d go and play three times a week, and yet, not lose out on time at home.

My husband thinks it’s too early but he’s left the decision to me, and from time to time, he, like me, laments the fact that we don’t have the guts to let her be for now and cross the admission bridge when we come to it.



Filed under mommyrage

2 responses to “I wish I had the guts to swim against the current..

  1. I guess you are taking the right decision. Children learn a lot of good things in school, including good manners and become more disciplined and independent. Its really hard on the mother to believe that her kiddo is “big” enough for school and then the butterflies in your stomach wondering how your child is doing in school, may be a deterring factor – but at the end of the day you wil not regret it as your child learns faster with other toddlers. With the ABC’s and the 123’s taken care of in the school, you will have more time to tell her fairy tales and play with dough… so take heart and let her just go …

    Crabbymommy: I know what you are saying..letting go is what I need to do. Sometimes its more about the mother than the child!

  2. More than anybody else we know when our kids r ready, as i too knew deep down in my heart that my elder girl was ready for school…. I too put her to playschool early. Other than the 1st 2 days of school..she seemed to like the atmosphere ..
    we moms can never go wrong when it comes to the decision making…the earlier kids get independent the better.

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